“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi

Gandhi’s words are a powerful reminder: happiness is an inside job. It has nothing to do with the car you drive, what anyone thinks of you, where you live, or how much stuff you have. It’s a matter of being clear about what matters to you and choosing thoughts, words, and actions in alignment with those values. 

When you’re not happy, look for what’s askew. What are you saying, thinking or doing that doesn’t serve you or align with what you hold dear? Where are you judging what you’re seeing or experiencing? Where are you attached to a certain outcome? Where are you in the groove of an old record that it’s time to break over your knee and toss aside? Where do you need new boundaries? What can you learn from the experience?

You’re not a victim, you’re an observer and creator. Get present. Breathe. Experience. Notice. Choose. Love. BE.

"Welcome the present moment as if you had invited it. It is all we ever have, so we might as well work with it rather than struggling against it. We might as well make it our friend and teacher rather than our enemy." ~Pema Chodron

Every moment contains an opportunity for a choice - love or fear? Possibility or limitation? Seriousness or light-heartedness? Resistance or acceptance? Growth or comfort? Creating change requires consistently making choices in alignment with your goal.

That may sound simple, but it requires a level of awareness most of us don’t have much experience maintaining. Have you ever arrived somewhere in your car with no recollection of the journey? Walked away from a conversation and had no idea what was said? Events like those remind us how often we operate on auto-pilot, without being fully present. While our ability to function automatically can save us a lot of time, it can also undermine our transformation.

Practicing presence is absolutely crucial to our personal revolution. Two of the most powerful keys to presence are sensation & breath. Notice your thoughts, emotions, actions, and physical responses. Pay attention to what tempts you to check-out, run away, or numb out. Be there for every possible moment.

No matter what is happening around you, you have a choice. Who you will be in the face of it? What story will you tell about it? Will you suffer over it or accept it? Will you let it stop you or find a way to learn and grow from it? Your life is the sum-total of the choices you made in the ever-unfolding present moment. Choose!

“The path of love and the path of insight lead into the same garden.”~ Stephen Mitchell

Organized religions sometimes assert that there’s ONE path to enlightenment, peace, and “everlasting life”. But there’s a golden thread of love and truth that runs through all spiritual practices. We’re all on a path to the same garden.

Our paths may include a wide variety of practices, like meditation, contemplation, devotion, public worship, and acts of service. No matter what route we take, I believe we all want to experience love, joy, peace, and a sense that our life matters in some way.

Ego often judges different choices as incorrect ones. There are no accidents, though, and a decision that looks entirely wrong from our perspective is usually EXACTLY what needed to happen in the grand scheme of things. Our job isn’t to fix or change anyone (who says our answer is right, anyway?!?); our job is to love.

Heaping layer after layer of judgment onto what we see and experience breeds barriers and defensiveness; sending love to ourselves, each other, the planet and all its inhabitants creates connection. We don’t have to worry about what is right or wrong or pretend to know what’s best for anyone. We just need to practice choosing love.

"This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness." ~ Dalai Lama XIV

Spirituality is a very individual journey – there’s no one-size-fits-all solution. I opt for practices that are simple, portable, and leave me feeling loved and loving.

Lovingkindness Meditation does that for me. While it’s labeled “meditation”, it can easily be taken into the world and practiced in any moment.

It’s a simple series of phrases you repeat silently or aloud. Typically, there are several rounds - yourself, a loved one, an acquaintance, a “difficult” person, and all beings. I learned this version years ago from Roberta Hughes.

May I be free of fear and harm.

May I be happy as I am.

May I be at peace with whatever comes.

1. Offer the phrases first to yourself (you might imagine yourself as a child or visualize yourself in the mirror). Then hold the following in your mind and heart, and offer the phrases to each:
2. Someone you love dearly.  
3. A casual acquaintance (store clerk, someone you passed on the street, etc.).
4. Someone with whom you have a strained or challenging relationship.
5. All beings everywhere.

Change the phrasing to “work” in each instance, e.g., “May John be...”, “May the waitress be…”, May Susie be…”, “May all beings everywhere be…”.

You can’t mess it up – just offer lovingkindness wherever you’re called. It can be an “on-the-spot” offering, the list above, or a more expanded version. Alter the phrases until they feel “right” to you. Searching “Lovingkindess mantra” on the internet will yield many possibilties.

May we be free of fear and harm. May we be happy as we are. May we be at peace with whatever comes.

“I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion.
These three are your greatest treasures.

Simple in actions and in thoughts, you return to the source of being.
Patient with both friends and enemies, you accord with the way things are.
Compassionate toward yourself, you reconcile all being in the world.” ~Lao Tzu

 

Simplicity calls us to relax, trust, appreciate the little things, and let go of complicated ideas and ways of being. Life’s sweetest moments are also often the simplest. It’s not about how it looks; it’s about how it feels. To me, simple feels light and easy, while complicated feels heavy and grueling.

Patience calls us to slow down, stop pushing, and take a deep breath rather than rushing onward, annoyed with everyone and everything in our path. It’s an antidote to judgment. Rewarding, soul-touching moments generally prefer the soft glow of calm acceptance to the harsh light of frenetic striving.

Compassion lays a foundation of kindness and love. Many of us are really good at offering it up to others, but when we can offer it to ourselves, its power expands exponentially. It’s like a light beaming brightly into the darkness rather than a picture of a light in a dark window. The real thing reaches further than the idea.

There’s no need to pull the river – the keys to floating above the churning chaos lie in simplicity, patience, and compassion. One choice at a time.